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Top reasons why we SHOULD buy pirated VCDs



>1. Free black bag
>You can't get those cool black coloured bags anywhere.
>The ones sold outside
>is too big and they're meant for the tong sampah.


>2. Family bond
>Every weekend when you go to Summit USJ, you can see
>little kids running
>to the VCD shop to select their favourite Pokemon
>cartoon VCD. And then
>mommy will come along to find her favourite Teresa
>Teng VCD. Next, comes big
>sister selecting her F4 VCD. And lastly, big bro and
>daddy searching for
>the latest movies ... and try to eye for some
>you-know-what VCD. Anyway,
>the whole idea is, the pirated VCD shop is like a
>place for weekend
>family reunion. When is the last time you see daddy
>buying Little Billy a VCD
>in Speedy Video ?


>3.Cinema svcks
>When you reach the cinema, you'll have to line up for
>15 minutes before it's your turn to get the ticket.
>But then they tell you ticket sudah habis. So, you
>bought the next show and had to wait for another 3
>hours. When the time comes, the ticket usher stops you
>from bringing nasi lemak and cha-kuay-teow into the
>hall. So, you're forced to line up another 10 minutes
>in the snack bar. By then, you're already late for the
>show. Lampu sudah tutup when you went it. Oooppss ....
>terjatuh and everyone laugh at you.

>Next, the cinema bore you with 15 minutes of iklan.
>Frankly speaking, I dunno why the government ban
>'triple x' VCDs when all the beer commercials in the
>cinema features 10 sluts dancing around. Later, your
>handphone rang and everyone booed you. At last, the
>show ends but you'll need to beratur through the
>smelly exit. After 30 mintues, you noticed that your
>handphone is lost. The only thing good about cinemas
>is the fact that you can throw kua-chi on the floor.

>4. Customer Friendly Sellers
>Buying VCDs from the stall are like dining in a luxury
>restaurant. First, those blond hair sellers will
>greet you with 'leng-chai'. It's now time to order the
>meal. If you know what to order, they will search the
>title for you. But let's say if you're undecided,
>these fellas will suggest some meals for you.
>Strangely, all movies ( according to them ) is nice to
>watch. When you've finished, here comes the main
>course. The rectangular box containing all the finest
>artistic international stuff. And you can bargain too
>! But when you buy VCDs from Speedy Video, the shop
>assistant will stand few meters away from you, with
>their arms tied and eyes alert, thinking that you're
>another shoplifter.

>5. Beli barang buatan Malaysia
>The name says it all. No comment.


>6. You go to the movies...while watching the most
>suspense part in a love movie....as the guy and girl
>is about to kiss...all of a sudden the screen becomes
>matrix mode. And then it changes to some dull scene.
>Doesn't this sound familiar? Say thank you to our
>censorship board for helping us remove the itsy bitsy
>parts. You never get this when you buy pirated CDs.


>7. 6 years ago, piracy was a minority because of
>the original CD pricing and contents. 3 years ago,
>they increased original CD prices 70% and say it's
>because of import duties, tax and other crap. While at
>the same time the pirated CD prices drop from 50% -
>70%. Customers would prefer to buy from a sale right?


>8. Piracy helps students to learn new programs at
>a reduced price cost.
>If every student is going to spend RM800 just to buy
>Adobe Photoshop, then Malaysia would lag behind in the
>computer graphics industry. So in a long run,
>Malaysia's economy status becomes better with more
>knowledgeble citizens. And many people are willing to
>spend money to buy pirated CDs but not that willing to
>buy original cds. By buying the CDs they are
>circulating the money thus helping the money flow
>around and not stay in the pockets.

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ni aku ada cerita lawak jugak la.baru berlaku.ada 2 minggu.

macam ni.aku hari jumaat aku free.xde kerja.so 2 minggu lepas aku pun xde bende nak buat maka aku ngan kereta aku selamba la turun Damanasara semata-mata nak tengok keselamatan leng a.k.a amoi aku keje macam mana.so aku pun duduk la kat satu tempat.mmg sunyi.then tepat pukul 8.15 malam dia pun dah mula pergi kat kereta dia.so dia dah mula gerak balik la.so aku follow la.mmg aku kat belakang dia.follow rapat.tapi dia x perasan.follow punya follow sampai la kat tol.tol (tol damansara ke)? .....dia masuk lorong tunai.aku masuk lorong tunai.aku kat belakang dia....then aku perhati la....sekali time dia nak byar ni mmg aku ketawa giler. laugh.gif pasal? dia bayar tol kena bukak pintu. pastu baru aku teringat dia dah la pendek.genit.pastu plak kereta dia besar gedabak.(waja 1.6)........tahap aku ketawa tu sampai orang belakang hon aku suh jalan bayar tol...pasal aku asyik ketawa pasal tu.wkakakak laugh.gif laugh.gif lepas tu ada kat simpang 4.ada lampu isyarat.masa tu lampu merah.then ada kira-kira 7minit.aku ngan pantas lepak kat side kanan kereta amoi aku.so aku pun turun tingkap.aku gelakkan dia pasal kes kat tol tadi.memula dia x ngaku.lepas tu aku lakonkan balik cara dia bayar macam mana.baru dia teringat.terus aku gelakkan dia lagi la.aku perasan muka dia masa aku gelakkan tu merah `manja giler`wkakakakakak...........(aku mmg jenis kalau nak gelakkan amoi aku mmg aku gelak depan-depan-face to face.wkaakka)

disebabkan gelak berlebihan kaki aku terlepas pedal klac menyebabkan enjin kereta aku mati(gear aku set gear satu) masa dah lampu hijau!!!!!!enjin kereta aku mmg jenis senyap.gerak x gerak mmg x tahu.patut la aku cuba tekan-tekan minyak kereta x nak jalan rupa enjin dah mati sebelum tu. laugh.gif

so sesiapa yang ada awek genit@pendek korang `perhatikan` awek korang bayar tol macam mana ...........wkakakakak lawak giler.bayar tol kena bukak pintu.pasal tangan x sampai kat tangan x sampai kat tangan pekerja tol tu. tongue.gif Edited by Janice Wei Lan

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QUOTE(Janice Wei Lan @ Dec 15 2008, 03:12 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
ni aku ada cerita lawak jugak la.baru berlaku.ada 2 minggu.

macam ni.aku hari jumaat aku free.xde kerja.so 2 minggu lepas aku pun xde bende nak buat maka aku ngan kereta aku selamba la turun Damanasara semata-mata nak tengok keselamatan leng a.k.a amoi aku keje macam mana.so aku pun duduk la kat satu tempat.mmg sunyi.then tepat pukul 8.15 malam dia pun dah mula pergi kat kereta dia.so dia dah mula gerak balik la.so aku follow la.mmg aku kat belakang dia.follow rapat.tapi dia x perasan.follow punya follow sampai la kat tol.tol (tol damansara ke)? .....dia masuk lorong tunai.aku masuk lorong tunai.aku kat belakang dia....then aku perhati la....sekali time dia nak byar ni mmg aku ketawa giler. laugh.gif pasal? dia bayar tol kena bukak pintu. pastu baru aku teringat dia dah la pendek.genit.pastu plak kereta dia besar gedabak.(waja 1.6)........tahap aku ketawa tu sampai orang belakang hon aku suh jalan bayar tol...pasal aku asyik ketawa pasal tu.wkakakak laugh.gif laugh.gif lepas tu ada kat simpang 4.ada lampu isyarat.masa tu lampu merah.then ada kira-kira 7minit.aku ngan pantas lepak kat side kanan kereta amoi aku.so aku pun turun tingkap.aku gelakkan dia pasal kes kat tol tadi.memula dia x ngaku.lepas tu aku lakonkan balik cara dia bayar macam mana.baru dia teringat.terus aku gelakkan dia lagi la.aku perasan muka dia masa aku gelakkan tu merah `manja giler`wkakakakakak...........(aku mmg jenis kalau nak gelakkan amoi aku mmg aku gelak depan-depan-face to face.wkaakka)

disebabkan gelak berlebihan kaki aku terlepas pedal klac menyebabkan enjin kereta aku mati(gear aku set gear satu) masa dah lampu hijau!!!!!!enjin kereta aku mmg jenis senyap.gerak x gerak mmg x tahu.patut la aku cuba tekan-tekan minyak kereta x nak jalan rupa enjin dah mati sebelum tu. laugh.gif

so sesiapa yang ada awek genit@pendek korang `perhatikan` awek korang bayar tol macam mana ...........wkakakakak lawak giler.bayar tol kena bukak pintu.pasal tangan x sampai kat tangan x sampai kat tangan pekerja tol tu. tongue.gif


ko ni melampau tau gelakkan awek ko tak smpai tgn nk byr tol.. ari tu ko gelakkan die jugk kan? tak bek... tp aku gelakkan kat ko sbb mati enjin kat tgh org wahahah!!! malu!!!

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QUOTE (teri-chan @ Dec 14 2008, 05:51 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
ko ni melampau tau gelakkan awek ko tak smpai tgn nk byr tol.. ari tu ko gelakkan die jugk kan? tak bek... tp aku gelakkan kat ko sbb mati enjin kat tgh org wahahah!!! malu!!!

alah dia tau aku gelakkan dia kaw kaw masa tu.tu baru sikit.......ni bawah ada lagi.

orang melayu sebut `skirt` dia sebut `skin`wkakakaka

orang melayu sebut `empat ratus lima puluh` dia `empat puluh lima ratus` laugh.gif

orang melayu sebut `malam dah gelap` dia plak sebut `malam dah sunyi` laugh.gif

memula dia cakap tu aku berkerut gak kepala....la ni dah biasa dah. laugh.gif adoiii leng leng.....kelakar plak aku fikir balik.... laugh.gif

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hehhehe takpeh.. ko jglah awek ko leklok...

NEW MALAYSIAN POEM


Can study continue STUDY
Can't study, work FACTORY
Cannot rely on CHARITY

Earn a little SALARY
Just enough 4 daily ROTI
Go work no WIRA but LRT.

Colleagues formerly FRIENDLY
Daily treated to KOPI
Now gradually get CRAZY
Behind me say I LAZY.

Boss has no SYMPATHY
Work always must HURRY
Say I not enough BUSY
Often ask me do OT

Midnight go back by TAXI
TAXI surcharge KILLING ME
Now i pokai and NO MORE MONEY

Borrow from chettia kena EXTRA FEE
Coz money is never FREE

Boy/girl-friend go STEADY
Serious, and then MARRY
Ceremony and PARTY
joker-friends give PANTY
No money sure no HONEY

10 months later be DADDY
Wife at GH birth a BABY

Monthly pay back RHB
Earn not enough FEEL GUILTY
Jump down suicide and MATI
No money 4 funeral how to BURY
Go see God every thing hoping will JADI
Because MALAYSIA BOLEH. SEMUA JADI.

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QUOTE(z_tecon @ Dec 15 2008, 09:32 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
pandai gak ko berbahasa inggeris ek? happy.gif



hehe apsal tak buleh pulak? heheh buleh.. skit2 je hikhikhik...

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hehhe aku bukan cikgu.. kat english corner lg ramai yg pandai hehehhe..

Lessons in Logic


If your father is a poor man,
it is your fate but,
if your father-in-law is a poor man,
it's your stupidity.


...........................................................

I was born intelligent -
education ruined me.


...........................................................



Practice makes perfect.....
But nobody's perfect......
so why practice?


...........................................................




If it's true that we are here to help others,
then what exactly are the others here for?


...........................................................



Since light travels faster than sound,
people appear bright until you hear them speak.


...........................................................



How come "abbreviated" is such a long word?


...........................................................


Money is not everything.
There's MasterCard & Visa.

...........................................................


One should love animals.
They are so tasty.


...........................................................



Behind every successful man, there is a woman
And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.


...........................................................


Every man should marry.
After all, happiness is not the only thing in life.


...........................................................



The wise never marry.
and when they marry they become otherwise.


...........................................................


Success is a relative term.
It brings so many relatives.


...........................................................


Never put off the work till tomorrow
what you can put off today.


...........................................................


"Your future depends on your dreams"
So go to sleep


...........................................................


There should be a better way to start a day
Than waking up every morning


...........................................................


"Hard work never killed anybody"
But why take the risk


...........................................................


"Work fascinates me"
I can look at it for hours


...........................................................


God made relatives;
Thank God we can choose our friends.


...........................................................


The more you learn, the more you know,
The more you know, the more you forget
The more you forget, the less you know
So.. why learn.

...........................................................

A bus station is where a bus stops.

A train station is where a train stops.

On my desk, I have a work station....
what more can I say........

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hahahaha.. sbb soalan ko ialah klaka tak.. tu kire untung le tu ader org tlg gelakkan hahahha!!!

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Kentut Punye Crite

Ada sepasang suami isteri yang dah lama kawin, si laki ni ada satu tabiat buruk iaitu setiap kali bangun tidor mesti dia kentut, kentut puaka gitu sebab bunyi ia mengegarkan bilik tidor dan baunya yarabbi tak leh nak cerita nanti penulis muntah pulak. si bini ni memang sokmo komplen pasal kentut tu dan banyak kali termuntah sebab tak tahan, tapi silaki dengan muka penuh selamba menjelaskan, kentut tu perkara semula jadi yang baik untuk kesihatan. satu hari si bini yg dah lama tak tahan perangai si laki berkata, " satu hari nanti awak kentut bukan sahaja angin yang keluar, semua isi perut awak pun akan keluar sama, masa tu baru padan muka", silaki cuma
sengih jer.

Hari raya korban pun tiba, keluarga tersebut banyak dapat daging dan dalam banyak banyak bungkusan tu ada perut lembu, hati, paru-paru.. maka timbul lah idea si bini nak pekena laki dia. masa laki dia tengah seronok tido dia telah longgokkan perut lembu yang berjela jela betul betul kat bontot laki dia, lepas tu dia pun ke dapur untuk menunggu aksi seterusnya.

Dipendekkan cerita, maka laki dia pun bangun dan macam rutine biasa dia melepaskan das das kentutnya yang maha dasyat bunyi nya dan maha belantung baunya, si bini tunggu dengan penuh kusyuk, dari dlm bilik tido terdengor suara laki dia menjerit sakan, histeria gitu, sibini tertongeng tongeng dan guling guling ketawa. 20 minit pastu si laki pun kedapor untuk sarapan, sibini pun buat buat donno dan kontrol macho.

"Masin betul lah mulut awak, habis tali perut saya terkeluor macam yang awak cakap aritu. kata laki dia bersunguh sunguh.

"Habis tu abang buat macam mana" tanya sibini sambil kontrol suara dan perut yg nak pecah sebab nak ketawa.

"Nasib baik abang tak panik, abang terus ke bilik air, dan sekarang semua dah settle".

"Hah dah settle! abng buat macam mana" tanya sibini, agak suspen.

"Dengan menggunakan jari sahaja abng berjaya memasukkan balik semua isi perut abang tadi... tak payah susah susah pegi hospital untuk operasion" Si bini diam kaku...

moral: perut lembu tak boleh di salahgunakan

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KISAH SI ALI

Maka tersebutlah kisah di sebuah kampung bernama Pinang 18, namanya sebegitu kerana hanya terdapat 18 pokok pinang kat kampung tu,kira banyak jugakkan... tinggal lah seorang orang yg gila bernama Ali( memang nama sebenar). Ali tinggal seorang diri setelah kedua ibubapanya meninggal dunia. Pondoknya terletak di hujung kampung. Ada org kata, Ali ni mewarisi sifat gila dari bapanya..
Peristiwa tragis ini berlaku pada hari Jumaat. maka hendak dijadikan cerita, seperti hari2 jumaat yg lain, Ali akan pergi ke masjid utk menunaikan solat jumaat. sungguhpun dia ni gila..tapi dalam bab sembahyang dia tak pernah gila. Oleh itu kengkawan semua, contohilah sikap Ali ni, jgnlah miss solat. nnti kita lebih gila dari org yg gila.
Setelah selesai solat, Ali pun macam biasa nak bali! k rumah dia. Puas dicarinya selipar buruk kesayangannya, tapi tak berjumpa jugak. Benganglah si Ali ni sebab selipar dia dah kena curi. Dengan tergesa2..Ali masuk balik ke dalam masjid dan terus menuju ke microfon. Apalagi...dia pun buat pengumuman dengan suara yg ala2 ganaz lagi brutal..
"Kepada sesiapa yg curik kasut aku, tolong pulang balik, kalau tak aku akan buat macam yg arwah bapak aku buat tahun lepas!!!!"
Maka takutlah orang kampung Pinang 18. Almaklumler. ..orang giler ni kalau nak mengamuk punyalah dahsyat. Kalau tak guna parang, mesti tak thrill.
Tetiba datanglah seorang budak dengan wajah yg pucat lagi takut menjinjing selipar buruk Ali. Sambil tersengih2 budak tu berkata...
"Alaaa abang ni.. saya nak bergurau pun tak boleh.."
Ali menjegilkan biji matanya tanda geram sesangat kat budak tu. Lintang-pukanglah budak tu lari.
Setelah dapat selipar buruknya..Ali pun bersiap2 utk meninggalkan masjid. Pak Imam yg dari tadi memerhatikan kelakuan Ali cuba mendekatinya. Dengan rasa takut.. Pak Imam pun bertanya...
"Errrr...boleh aku tahu..apa yg arwah bapak ko buat bila dia tak dapat semuala selipar dia"
"Balik kaki ayamler..."jawab Ali dengan selamba rocknyerr..

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